What Were You Thinking, Paul Anka?

I cringe a little bit every time Paul Anka's song You're Having My Baby comes on the radio. In fact, I find the lyrics so offensive I want to call Mr. Anka on the phone and ask him that great Dr. Phil question, "What were you thinkin?"

I mean, how in the world, even in the not-so-politically-correct era of the mid-70s, could he possibly have thought that referring to the child his wife was carrying as "my baby" might not be offensive to -- oh, let's think about it for just a second... -- just about EVERYBODY? And since the words might be offensive especially to women (ya think?), and since my guess is that most of his previous hits were purchased by female fans, I wonder, again, how could he possibly have made such a blunder?

Let's look at some of the more poignant lines in the song. You're having my baby. What a lovely way of saying how much you love me. Well, you know, call me overly critical, but the line seems just a tad on the self indulgent side. But then again, maybe that's just me.

Or, how about this one? The seed inside you, can you feel it growing? Lovely thought, perhaps. But, I don't know, a bit too agricultural, I think.

And let's not forget the most memorable line in the entire song. Didn't have to keep it, wouldn't put you through it. You could have swept it from your life but you wouldn't do it. That's wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin!

I guess in all fairness we have to bear in mind that You're Having My Baby was written by the same songwriter who brought us other such classics as I Don't Like to Sleep Alone and Puppy Love. So hey, what else is there to say?

Truth be told, after the song You're Having My Baby was released (and after receiving far more criticism than he counted on!), Paul Anka apologized publicly for his insensitivity, and even altered the title and the words to read You're Having Our Baby.

Nice try, Paul. Ever hear of the song Too Much, Too Little, Too Late?